Life is a Parade or an Anti-Depressant- You Make the Call

Or something like that...

Papa and Rowan

My dad and his wife, Veronica aka Vee, just moved back to Alamosa, Colorado after a 6 year hiatus in Minnesota. (I know she is technically my step-mom and I love her more than anything, but I honestly can't say "stepmom" without laughing since she is only 7 years older than me- sorry Vee.) A month or so ago they had this truly brilliant idea (although not unique we quickly learned) to meet in Denver, get hotel rooms downtown and take the girls to the Parade of Lights; Denver's fairly decent display of bands and floats decorated in... uh, well, lights. We thankfully agreed and Friday evening my nice boss, Peggy, dropped me at 17th and Champa after we attended the three Granby HOA's annual meetings up at Granby Ranch (it went very well, thanks for asking). Shortly thereafter, the girls arrived with their Dad, and it was great to all be together. It's been a long time. Dad and Vee are the best Nana and Papa... they love just hanging out with the girls and it was cool to see the girls warm up to them so quickly.

Nana and Tressin (the sign did say "Only 7 and under"- maybe Vee assumed it was feet?)

Two Pretty Cool Dudes


Mama and her little Bugeater

Scott and I were super spoiled- we got to go out a little (okay maybe a little more than a little), sleep in BOTH mornings and have the best dinner ever at Panzano's in the Oxford Hotel- we highly recommend it and Christian the waiter. We are so lucky and hope they know how grateful we are...

We also managed to get a tree on Sunday afternoon. It's all set up. Nothing says Christmas like a fire hazard that constantly drops pine needles everywhere. It does smell good.

I have a million things to do in the next couple weeks in xmas prep. Megan, Ryan and Mathisen get here on the 23rd. And on the 26th, we are all piling in a rented Yukon and heading to the Valley to see the rents again.

But I just try and take it one day at a time. The other morning we were headed to school and Rowan says, quite seriously, something I can't really make out. I had her repeat it a few times and then I got it--- "Mom, when depression hurts, there's Cymbalta, right?" I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I just decided to cut back on the TV. What can you do?

Top Ten and a Half Things Learned on the Trip to Nebraska (for nine days)

1. Tressin can scream for about an hour strait (starting in Fort Morgan, mind you).

2. When cows are sleeping with their legs pointing up in the air, they are not sleeping. The deadwagon just hasn't been by yet.

3. Sage brush can look just like a deer to a city girl.

Tressin, Grandpa Starman and Rowan

4. Taco pizza from Godfathers is quite possibly the world's most perfect food.



5. Catching your 4 year old daughter kissing your best friend's 4 year old son is a little freaky and very funny.

Landon and Rowan

6. Cute little old ladies playing bingo take it very seriously.

Great Grandma Lordemann and Rowan

"Bingo" says Tressin

7. My idea of a small piece of pie and Grandma's idea of a small peice of pie are quite different. "It'll do."

Aunt Julie, Rowan and Bailee

8. Canasta takes forever to play. But I already knew that. I did learn that Aunt Rita can sleep between turns.

Tressin and Bailee

9. Nebraska football games are like nothing else in this world but losing your diamond earring can ruin even the best day.

Sea of Red

10. Starman has a freaking huge family- but again, I knew that already.

Starman and maybe 1/2 of his cousins

Maybe a 1/4 of the great grandkids- Tress was sleeping

10 1/2. Life is good when Sister Agnes is almost done with her chocolate martini.

Not the Usual List

So every where I look there are these lists of what everyone is thankful for. Family, friends, health all seem the common denominator. Well not on the Starman blog folks... As I thought today about what I am truly thankful for I came up with some rather unusual answers.

1.) Divorce
Uh come again, I can hear most people saying. But really, I am thankful that my parents and Scott's parents were smart enough and brave enough to endure the pain of divorce. While it caused both of us some heartache, and our parents too, I'm sure- without it we wouldn't be the people we are today. More importantly we wouldn't have these incredible step-parents in our lives and in the lives of our girls. Without the "Big D" there would be no Bobcat, no Bonnie, no Vee and no Ermin. A life I really can't imagine and frankly, don't want to.

2.) Disease and Death
Are you done reading yet? I know, it's pretty glum talk for what is supposed to be such an upbeat time of year, but stick with me, if you can. I will spare the gory details... Our family has been through the wringer when it comes to horrible, incurable ailments that can and have taken the lives of people we love way earlier than we would have liked. But again, it is the challenge of these times that have brought us together, made us understand the frailty of life and be truly thankful for every moment we have. Life isn't a dress rehearsal, so go ahead and have seconds, have another glass of wine and for God sakes, dance. You can't do it when your dead.

3.) War
This one is tough. Very tough. How on earth does someone find a reason to give thanks for such a reprehensible act? Because it makes those of us that are safe and warm and full and able to vote, safe and warm and full and able to vote. Our Larry is in Afghanistan right now. The pictures and videos he is able to post on Myspace give us only a glimpse into what he is going through, but I believe the Army saved him from an even darker life. I am sure that I will never be able to fully comprehend what the Vietnam and WWII vets in our family endured. And they did it simply because they were asked to by their country. I am thankful for it. More than words can say.

Thanksgiving isn't always what you think it will be. Most of the time, it's better. Kinda like life.

Happy Thanksgiving from The Starman's!

A three hour tour, a three hour tour

I wonder how Gilligan felt when he was packing up the tiny ship. Probably not too worried. I mean, all he needed was a couple fishing poles, a tray of snacks and a camera to take pictures of the two hotties, Mary Anne and the movie star. I am sure that he didn't feel like he was going to have a nervous breakdown... kinda like I feel right now. Tomorrow evening we leave on our nine day trip to Nebraska. Scott keeps asking me why I have to tell everyone it's nine days.

BECAUSE IT'S NINE DAYS!

(an aside to quote one of the best movies of all time... "Nine times? I don't remember him being sick nine times." "That's prbably because he wasn't sick. He was skipping school." Okay, got that out of my system)

Now don't get me wrong. I am totally looking forward to seeing everyone. I know Scott really is too and the girls are going to have a blast. But seriously, just thinking about, let alone trying to organize and pack, nine days worth of all the crap that two adults and two small children need as they travel from one destination to the other, has led me to this- blogging and drinking a Bud Lite, at the same time no less. I know, I know, there are washing machines and Wal Marts in Nebraska so dirty clothes and the forgotton toothbrush are not going to ruin the trip, but still... Why can't I get that song out of my mind? "A three hour tour, a three hour tour."

Now back to work...

I said Yes

November 14, 2002. It was a Thursday. Scott had been laid off for about a month. He was home and bored and kept calling me and calling me, "What are you doing? When are you coming home?" I was getting annoyed. "Uh, working. And yeah, when I am done, I will be home."

We met in March 2001. Went on our first "date" in April. In May, I went to back to his little sister's graduation in Nebraska and met the family. We moved in together in June. In September, we bought a truck together. My mom asked, "What will you do when you break up?" I just told her, "I really don't think we will."

So I was driving home on that Thursday evening. Annoyed. He called again. "Are you on your way home?" Grrrrrr. "YES." I pulled into the driveway and the door was wide open. I thought to myself, "What is he thinking? Like we have money for the door to be wide open on a cold November night when he isn't working?" Double grrrrrrr.

But when I got to the door and looked inside, my heart and chin dropped. Every candle in the house was lit and they were all over the living room. And a huge bouquet of roses was perched on the kitchen table. I couldn't see him. So I walked inside and he came around the corner. The rest is kind of a blur... But I remember a ring and a kneel-down and the best question I have ever been asked.

I cried. And I said Yes.

The Mama Speaks (and smiles)

You cannot deny the occasion. You cannot deny the history.

I was lucky enough to be raised to believe that we are all equal; regardless of your color, religion, ability. And that's not just what I believe, it's how live. But I really didn't know if I would ever see a day like today. America is a place where all things are possible. I've never believed it more than I do right now. And now the hard work begins...

I can't stop thinking about my little Tress. At almost 18 months, she hardly knows the significance, and that's the best part. That's progress and a small part of leaving her a better world.

Tomorrow morning I will tell my daughters that in this country, one that their great-grandpa's fought for, that their grandpa's fought and served for and one that their uncles fight for today, that they can be anything they want. And I will never stop. Because they can.
And tonight proves it.

This holiday has been brought to you by your local dentist.

Halloween was two days long for us since Rowan doesn't have school on Fridays, the preschoolers celebrated on Thursday. The big parade was scheduled for 9:45am and since that really doesn't give me enough time to drive into work and back, I was lucky enough to get to stay and help in the classroom. I loved it! The teachers put me to work cutting and I am not a great cutter, I learned. I cut 68 little palm tree tops. Poor kids imaginations will get a work out on that one. Then it was costume time. Okay, I really don't think there is anything cuter than 12 little preschoolers in costumes...

And their off...

That's right Rowan, police officers are your friend!

That night we carved pumpkins. Rowan did a great job on this one...

Then disaster struck at the hands of her little sister (more due to lack of supervision on my part so I took the blame) and it ended up like this, shortly after the above picture was taken. Rowan took it in stride, thank goodness.

What a dad! He drives 800 miles and pours 2 courts in 36 hours and still has time for pumpkin carving.

And then it's finally Halloween.

Rowan is Daphne from Scooby Doo fame. Don't get me started. I was pushing for Velma and then we got into the "is it better to be smart than pretty or pretty than smart debate." I guess lucky for her, she's both. Tressin is a girl turtle- or gurtle. And quite the gurtle she is. She walked all the way to the end of the block and back with her bucket. And what's with these kids automatically getting the whole trick or treat concept? She just walks up to the door, sticks her bucket up and someone puts candy in it. I think they are born with it.Trick or treat partners- Ryan and Kiera from next door.

The Starman girls. Da da-da daaaaa....it's Super Mom. Faster than a falling sippee cup, able to leap large piles of laundry in a single bound.

Hope your Halloween was a good one. Now go brush your teeth!

If You Don't Vote, Don't Bitch

Crap. Here comes winter. Maybe? It's been so nice it's hard to remind yourself that before you know it it will be cold. Yuck. All the leaves are off the trees, the sprinkler system will be blown out this weekend for SURE and I better up my search for some decent size 10 boots for Rowan. But it is going to be so busy the next couple months, maybe I won't notice. Of course, Halloween on Friday, pretty sure one post will be dedicated to that topic. We took two grumpy girls to the pumpkin patch the weekend before last. Five pumpkins and $600 later, I'm still trying to figure out when exactly they will all get carved in the next 48 hours.

Then November and a week in Nebraska! Christmas will be here before I know it. We are making our first real Christmas dinner. Megan, Ryan and Mathisen will be here and my mom and the Bobcat! We have done Thanksgiving once but this is a Christmas first. I am pretty excited! Starman's can cook up some s***, I'll tell you what.

Last Monday, the girls and I went to the Children's Museum in Denver with my mom. What a cool place! They really liked it and I will definitely go back. We got there right pretty much when it opened and that was perfect. Then me and my "ladies" met an old friend of mine from high school for lunch. Since she was working. she was dressed very nice. When we got up to leave the restaurant, Rowan looked down at her high heels, (she definitely has never seen her mom in any!) and exclaimed "I love your shoes!" On the way home she asked me if she was a princess. I told her yes, yes she is. It was so nice to see my old friend again...

Starman is gone as usual... in Ridgeway, maybe there isn't an "e", can't remember. At least he got to drive through the beautiful town of my birth, Montrose, Colorado. He said the McCain-Obama people were out in full force on opposite sides of the main intersection in town, yelling, waving their signs. In Montrose??? Kinda surreal. I think he will be done traveling for awhile after this. We hope so.

Pink cowboy hat- a long time favorite

Cheerio booger

We stopped fighting over the hat for two seconds and happened to smile.

Happy Halloween!

And most of all, VOTE!

T.S. Eliot, William Faulkner, Kirsten Starman??

Sometimes I think too much. I'm telling you I can over-analyze like no other. For instance, I have started this blog post three times today, just to delete it. It's funny that when you think you have a lot to say, or blog as it is, you sit down and nothing comes out. Pardon the stream of consciousness post...it's the best I can do today.

First, let me tell you how much fun it was to have the Winn's in town. We partied like rock stars and realized we are way to old for such shenanigans. As fun as it was, it was bittersweet for me. I miss Stephanie more than I realized. I really do believe in my heart we will be friends forever. But the reality has set in. We will be long distant friends forever. They would be crazy to leave their beautiful house and all their family and the chances of us moving to Fremont, Nebraska are very slim, to say the least. I miss meeting at Target, taking the kids to the park, to the zoo, to Wendy's. I miss going over to their house for dinner on a whim. I remember my mom telling me one time, "When you die, if you can count your good friends on one hand, consider yourself lucky." Well, one down.

Work...argh. Scott has been gone a lot. Vegas, Salt Lake, the aforementioned trip to Omaha, Vegas and back to Vegas next week. It's better than the alternative; having no work. But his absence is exhausting for all of us. My job has been pretty challenging lately as well and I can sum it up in one word...budgets. Unless you live under a rock, you know that the economy is, uh ,well, volatile. Makes putting together budgets, especially the part when you tell people how much your services are going to cost them, fun. Car accident fun. Hemorrhoid fun. Besides that, look what happened to some of our constituents in Windsor yesterday. I took this picture this morning since yesterday morning there was so much water gushing out, I had to stand on the play structure behind the fence to survey what was going on. The poor homeowner said, "It sounds like a jet!" I thought, it sounds like a lot of money that no one is going to want to spend. Sweet.

Scott and I had our first ever parent-teacher conference on Friday afternoon. Talk about a milestone. The report from Mrs. Hess was about what we expected. Rowan is trending to be a class leader and a little above where she should be academically. Right on target socially. We were both so impressed with her teacher, the curriculum and the very detailed progress system they have for preschoolers. Looks like she will do pre-K next year and we are crossing our fingers for all day kindergarten the year after. Rowan still loves it. She said to me last week, "I want to go to school all day because I just love school."



And then there is Tressin who, although she still doesn't say any real words, makes us laugh and keeps us on our toes; she loves to play with everything she is not supposed to and nothing she is supposed to. Her pediatrician and Kelly keep me on an even kilter when it comes to her speech, or lack thereof. At her last well-check, I expressed my concern, "She doesn't say anything. Maybe a rare ma or da. But that's it." At first he patiently explained to me that she was fine, that it was very common in second children, especially with an older sibling that is quite verbal (enter Rowan). I continued to prod and question, so he did some very basic autism evaluations. "Tressin," he said. She looked right at him. He pointed to a poster on the wall, "What's that?" She looked right over at it. She's fine, he said. Freakazoid mother was still not satisfied and I think he was starting to lose his patience a little. "Do you think she hears okay?" he asked. "Yes." "SHE'S FINE!" Okay, okay, okay.


It's cold and rainy and I won't be surprised if there is snow on the ground tomorrow morning. We went for a walk today and I took a picture of this barn I always admire when we walk to the other side of the subdivision. It's so "American". I love it. Our good ole buddy Tango is buried on the bank of the pond you can barely see in the foreground. I guess he gets to enjoy it all the time.

My dad and Vee will be saying goodbye to St Cloud, Minnesota and heading back to Alamosa on Monday. We are happy to have them a little closer but pretty bummed we can't be at the big going away party tonight. Oh well, our livers will thank us.

Oh yeah. Remind to not talk about football on this blog anymore. Remember "All three Starman team are undefeated"? I jinxed them. The Buffs and Huskers have not won since. So I am not even going to say Go Broncos! Whoops.

That's that.

One Incredible Woman

Ninety years ago today, Scott's sweet, amazing, inspirational, cute little Grandma was born. Yes--90 years! Now, I have only known Lucille for the last 7 and a half. I'm no mathemateican so I will just say that's a real small percentage of the time she has spent on this earth. But from the minute I met her, I knew she was someone very special. Now, you must know, if you don't already, that Lucille and her beloved husband, Ray, had 14 children! Yes--14 children! Again, I have been in the know for almost 8 years and it still blows my mind. I wish I knew the exact numbers but she has more than a couple dozen grankids and the great grandkid count has to be over 50! Yeah the numbers are huge but what's even more amazing than that is that Grandma has a way of making every last one of us (even those of us lucky enough to have married into this crazy family) feel important and loved and special. What a gift!

Grandma loves to quilt and sew. She'll whoop you at any card game. Her faith in God is unwavering. Family is her life. I don't doubt that she misses Grandpa Ray everyday, especially on days like today. But I am also sure that he is with her, wishing her the best of times and urging her to enjoy them all.

Luckily, Scott is able to be in Omaha today to celebrate with Grandma, the Lordemann clan and the wanna-bes. Drink a white russian for me; I will be there in spirit.

So instead of Happy Brithday (it's too passe to capture the magnitude of what today really is) I will end with a Thank You. Thank you for being born, Grandma. Thank you for having my loving mother in law, who gave me and the world, an incredible man I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with. Most of all thank you for giving us the oppurtunity to share in the lives of our daughters. Without you, this Starman family ride would not be possible.

We hope you have a great day!

Goodbye Summer, Hello Football

I think around 9:44am today, summer officially ended. But rather than focusing on the end of another fun filled season of hot days and warm nights- I choose to focus on beginnings. Fall in Colorado; there is truly nothing like it. The night air begins to get that little bite of chill. Leaves stubbornly fall in full color as if to say "I'm gonna make you miss me". We busted out the Coleman for one last hoorah and headed to Jack's Gulch this past weekend. The weather was absolutely beautiful, even the little bit of rain was nice. We took a drive on Saturday. It was my idea, I admit it. And it started out well...

We saw some beautiful aspen fields as we travelled over Pennock Pass (a level 6 road! ain't nothin for the Chevy baby!)

But, as with all good mountain drives when you really don't know where you are going, it was way too long- especially with a little Tress that isn't so crazy about windy roads (way to go mom). About a half hour before we got back to camp Rowan just lost it-"But I just didn't want to go on such on long drive." Yep, mom of the year award- right here. Needless to say we made it through "the drive" and when we got back, Daddy set up the tent for the girls to play in. They thought that was pretty cool.

The weekend prior, Scott and I had a very nice time hanging out watching the Husker game Saturday night and golfing Sunday morning, while the girls had a sleepover at Grandma Sheila and the Bobcat's. I know it is important for us to have big people time but being at my house without my kids was super duper strange. Luckily, it doesn't happen very often. I will remind myself of that when Tressin needs a diaper change at 1am and Rowan has a bad dream at 4am.

The good news is... it's football season. The better news is... all three Starman teams are undefeated so far. Scott was lucky enough to be at the Denver/San Diego game courtesy of LER. Go Donkeys! Mama fears her Buffies have their work cut out for them this weekend when they travel to Jacksonville to face FSU. Oh well, The Winns will be here from Nebraska this weekend and I sure don't mind the incessant Go Big Red chants, especially when my BFF is around! Party in the garage at 2015 if you are in the neighborhood.

Suzie for President!

We made it through the Olympics, the DNC, Rowan's actual birthday, Labor Day weekend, the RNC, getting a new roof and Hurricane Gustav. Okay, maybe not the hurricane part but the last couple weeks have been action-packed, otherwise known as business as usual around here.

Scott and Derrick hit "the range" ghetto-Milliken style.




Our nice friends, the Kinyons, had us over for "potluck" and that was fun and loud and A LOT of little girls under 4~ plus John! All the entertainment we needed...





Saturday, the 6th, was Rowan's Birthday Fest 2008. This year, the twist we provided was the constant fear of being booted for illegally gathering in a "private" park. Oh yeah, and a Scooby Doo pinata. The feds never showed up to evict us and I think fun was had by all. I know that Rowan had a blast and I guess, in the end, that's all that matters. And, hey man, check out that cake Kelly made--groovy! Give that girl a scooby snack! :)




Now I refuse to let this family blog get political. I have no right to assume I can speak for the thoughts and beliefs of each member of this foursome. But I will say this, I want the best for the future of this world for two main reasons, who are asleep in the next room, and counting on me and their father to give them the tools for a wonderful life. But if anyone else is willing to start a write-in campaign for Suzie Wargin (the coolest sports chick ever), email me.


Peace out.